I nearly left the real me on the shelf.
– Jessie J
I have always wondered about my internal dialogue with myself and the internal dialogue I’m sure countless others have with themselves. Phrases and questions like: I’m proud of myself; I hate myself; Gbolade, get yourself together. Sometimes I refer to myself as we: Gbolade, we would definitely achieve this; we can do this. Sometimes I refer to myself as you: You can be a fool sometimes, what is wrong with you, how come you made that same mistake.
There’s a pattern of perceived pluralized consciousness in the examples, and I wonder why? Why do I see myself as more than one? Is it me trying to avoid responsibility for my actions, or trying to claim a higher moral ground than a “base” version of myself? Why the need to refer to myself as someone else sometimes especially when it’s in regard to an effort or in regard to a failure: You’re such an idiot, you should have known not to trust him. Why?
There’s a powerful quote I heard from Tony Robbins a while back, it’s not really a quote, it was more of a speech, and his entire point was that we would never rise to the level of our aspirations but only to the level of our expectations and true vision of ourselves. That means that the most important thing to consider when trying to live a better life is what you truly think of yourself right now, an honest estimation of yourself, now, and by extension how you talk to yourself.
A lot of people have a fancy idea of different parts of themselves, and I also do and have written about it here, but now that I know I will only rise to my ‘true’ expectations of myself, including the unsavory parts of myself, I tend to disagree with the seeming fact that I am fragmented and have different personalities, moods, and behaviors, cos I realize that is giving away my power to an imaginary extension of myself that does not really exist. I realize the power of being ONE!
You are ONE! One being! as hard as it sounds the moment we accept responsibility for every single thing in our life, and not blame anyone including the other part of ourselves that is/was weak, then we can experience true freedom.
My challenge to you is simple, don’t see yourself as split by personality, energy levels(tired, sleepy, excited), time(past, present and future self), moods(happy, sad). See yourself as one, be the future you you wanna be, accept the past you as a part of yourself, know that you have complete control over your selves, and move forward, in total acceptance. Did you do terrible things? accept it as you, you may be a new creature but accept and forgive yourself in order to truly heal. Do not blame your energy levels or moods, do not hope for a future better version of yourself, be ONE, be YOU, right now and forever!